Women in the church today, especially ministers' wives, are faced with a threefold challenge: their personal duty to God, their duty to their family, and their duty to their community. How should they respond to this challenge?
Putting God First
To do acceptable work in the second two fields the first one, duty to God, is a necessity. Putting God first is a must for every Christian. "Day by day God instructs His children. By the circumstances of the daily life He is preparing them to act their part upon that wider stage to which His providence has appointed them. It is the issue of the daily test that determines their victory or defeat in life's great crisis."—The Desire of Ages, p. 382.
But how does God instruct His people? Through Bible study and prayer; reading the blessed Book, talking to God as to a friend; then listening—yes, He says, "Be still, and know that I am God."
For years it has been a practice in our home to kneel as we get out of bed to seek His guidance for the day before taking the first steps or getting involved in some activities. While I was riding on a bus some time ago, I was chatting with an old gentleman across the aisle with whom I had shared a These Times magazine. He was traveling to his childhood home after losing his companion of more than fifty years. He was very restless. He'd read a little, smoke a little, then fold his hands and look out through the windows and exclaim about the familiar, beautiful countryside. In our conversation I mentioned kneeling as I get out of bed, and his remarks were a rebuke. He said, "Oh, lady, I don't wait until I get out of bed. As soon as I awaken, I just thank God for the new day and for sparing my life." Since then I've thought it over, and have decided one could stay in bed a long time and think of all sorts of things to make or break the day.
If we give our waking thoughts to God, our day is much safer.
A moment in the morning, ere the cares of day begin,
Ere the heart's wide door is open for the world to enter in;
Ah, then alone with Jesus, in the silence of the morn,
In heavenly sweet communion, let your duty day be born.
In the quietude that blesses with a prelude of repose,
Let your soul be soothed and softened, as the dew revives the rose.*
Some have said there's much more inspiration in a sunrise than in a sunset. More of us have enjoyed the sunsets. But when Joshua of old had any great problems ahead of him he arose early in the morning.
In the early morning hours while the day is fresh and new and our bodies are not physically exhausted we may get the oil for our lamp for the clay—our prayers, our Bible reading. and our quiet time with God and nature.
Billy Graham's Crusaders made a survey in two leading theological schools in the United States and found that 93 per cent of the students had no devotional life. He said, "No wonder the church is powerless. No wonder something has happened to us. Don't you dare start your day without reading the Word for your own soul and spending time with God in meditation and prayer. Get a lower grade, miss a study, miss anything, but don't miss that hour with God before the day begins."
That was his counsel to the students and when they protested because of lack of time he told them that they would have less time when they got out of school. In his devotional life Pastor Graham reads five psalms daily, because they help him to get along with God, and he reads one chapter of Proverbs to help him get along with his fellow men.
A moment in the morning, take your Bible in your hand,And catch a glimpse of glory from the peaceful promised land;It will linger still before you when you seek the busy mart,And, like flowers of hope, will blossom into beauty in your heart;The precious words, like jewels, will glisten all the day,With a rare, effulgent glory that will brighten all the way.*
The Sabbath school lesson and the Morning Watch are often used for family study in our homes, but private devotions call for our individual study. Books from the Spirit of Prophecy such as The Desire of Ages, Christ's Object Lessons, Steps to Christ, The Ministry of Healing, and others read through systematically day by day, where "she [Ellen G. White] opens before the reader undreamed of riches from this infinite treasure house," draw us near to God.
Duty to Her Family
Carolyn Blackwood says in The Pastor's Wife: "The minister's wife has a happier lot than any other woman. Owing to the nature of her husband's work she must meet certain trials and problems, but her opportunities for service far outweigh all handicaps. If I could turn back the hands of time and know all that lay before me, I should still choose to marry a minister, provided he were the one I married forty years ago!" +
The duties of the wife and mother are legion, but with God first and a Christian home and husband she may reign as queen of the home. The Adventist Home, page 231 states:
The king upon his throne has no higher work than has the mother. The mother is queen of her household. She has in her power the molding of her children's characters, that they may be fitted for the higher, immortal life. An angel could not ask for a higher mission; for in doing this work she is doing service for God. Let her only realize the high character of her task, and it will inspire her with courage. . .
In faithfully carrying on the petty round of duties, preparing the breakfast and getting the children off to school, caring for the baby, preparing meals, cheerfully answering the telephone for her husband and responding to every need and emergency in the church, a young mother is tried to the limit.
With God first and a faithful companion at her side to help, she will maintain the cheerful Christian atmosphere in the home that will build for eternity.
The lessons the little ones pick up in daily Christian living, through taking part in worship and in the various parts of the home program, help to make home a little heaven on earth. Not long ago when the children were asked what to pray for in worship, Jeannie said, "Let's pray that we'll be so good today that the angels will feel at home."
There is a God above, and the light and glory from His throne rests upon the faithful mother as she tries to educate her children to resist the influence of evil. No other work can equal hers in importance. She has not, like the artist, to paint a form of beauty upon canvas; nor, like the sculptor, to chisel it from marble. She has not, like the author, to embody a noble thought in words of power; nor, like the musician, to express a beautiful sentiment in melody. It is hers, with the help of God, to develop in a human soul the likeness of the divine.Ibid., p. 237.
Duty to Her Neighbors
There are so very many ways to serve our churches and communities without always taking the leading role. However, there are times when opening our homes even for a covered-dish dinner or a salad buffet supper is very rewarding. Some of us just have to break bread together, no matter how humble the fare, to extend our friendliness. Group entertaining helps solve the problem of returning invitations. The church members usually do not expect the pastor and his wife to return individual dinner invitations, but they do love to have an occasion for informal visits. One minister's wife who loved to entertain had three simple menus planned with three color schemes. Her dinners were symphonies of color; the guests were different for each occasion, and with a little background music and time for visiting, her social needs were complete and her church groups had a part in her home.
For the most part our entertaining should be easy and informal and offered first to those in trouble, or lonely, or in need. The children always enjoyed the Thanksgiving or Christmas dinners more when they could invite someone who lived alone or who needed love and sympathy. Another plan we shared as they were growing up was that of sending an attractive tray on special occasions to some shut-ins, who knew ahead of time that something was coming so had the anticipation as well as the realization of the surprise.
The folks on the street where we live should know something about us, not just that we don't keep Sunday, but because of some of the good-neighbor acts we do. When someone is ill we may be among the first to call and to bring some fruit, a book, some Rowers, or a word of cheer. It is surprising how many would love to have you offer a word of prayer. Anyone in need is our neighbor, and not necessarily only those in need of food or clothing. The world is cling for a little bit of love!
Society has its claims on a minister's wife too. True, she must care for her home, her children, her family's wardrobe, but she must also be alert to the needs of her community. There are many mothers in Israel who would baby-sit for the wife of the minister in order for her to extend her Christian services.
He desires us to extend our sympathies. But we are not to confine our affection and sympathy within four walls, and enclose the blessing that God has given us, so that others will not be benefited with us in its enjoyment.—Review and Herald, Oct. 15, 1895.
We are to work along with other women in the community to alleviate suffering. Some of the services to choose from, along with the local Dorcas-Welfare work in the church, are the local Red Cross, in which many are spending an afternoon a week in the sewing room, the WCTU, the ladies' auxiliary at your local hospital, the Cancer Society, and other goodwill projects.
With sufficient oil in our own lamps from our personal prayer life there will be time to do much good for our fellow men.
"Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven" (Matt. 5:16).
* From "A Moment in the Morning" by Arthur Lewis Tubbs, in Prayer Poems compiled by O. V. and Helen Armstrong, Abingdon Press.
+From The Pastor's Wife by Carolyn P. Blackwood. Copyright by W. L. Jenkins, 1951. The Westminster Press. Used by permission
