Do You Know How to Handle Frustration?

Here are a few practical suggestions on how to handle the next attack of frustration that hits you. . .

FRUSTRATION dogs the steps of most workers at times. This is normal if our minds are active, our spirits sensitive, and our intellects sharp. If you've never felt frustrated it is probably because you have slipped into a "jogging-along-and-couldn't- care - less - as - long - as - my - paycheck - arrives - promptly - at - the - end - of - the - month - whether - I've - earned - it - or - not" pattern! If you belong in this class you are, of course, to be pitied. If you don't, you'll certainly experience frustration whether you like it or not! The fact that it overtakes us should not worry us. What needs to concern us is how to deal with it when it comes. Unless taken in hand positively, it can poison our experience and reduce our productivity and effectiveness.

Here are a few practical suggestions on how to handle the next attack of frustration that hits you:

1. Do something creative. Paint a picture; cultivate a flower; write a poem, a story, or an article. If you can't do any of these, write a letter of comfort, of appreciation or congratulation. (And please, in writing to someone who has been appointed to a position of trust in the spiritual realm, never say "congratulations." This reveals poor taste and smacks of politics. Say rather "God bless you. Please be assured of my prayers.")

Most of our frustrations stem from the fact that our creative urges are being denied expression. Doing something satisfyingly creative will release the pressure and cause a ray of light to break through the clouds. Read 1 Kings 19 and you will dis cover that this is the therapy God used on Elijah during his juniper tree experience. He gave him three specific assignments, all of them creative. He needed a creative task to recharge his spent physical, intellectual, and spiritual resources.

2. Do something for which you will get no reward. Like helping a high school student with a math problem, taking a shut-in for a drive in your car, or inviting someone to lunch who is not in a position to return the invitation. Most of what we do as workers we do with the expectation of some kind of a reward. This desire for reward is not necessarily in itself sinful; it is doubtless a spark which has been implanted in the human heart by the Creator Himself. But it is the misuse and abuse of this urge that constitutes sin. What we are saying here is that it is an extremely healthful spiritual exercise to do something, sometimes, for which we will never get any reward, apart from the satisfaction of making somebody else happy. Doing things that are unrewarded develops within us a spiritual dimension that helps us keep our balance.

3. Spend some time alone. Angling enthusiasts tell us that their sport is a wonderful cure for frustration, simply because it separates a man from the crowd and forces him to be alone with his rod, the sea, and the sky. We are not advocating angling. But the principle is a good one. It does one's soul good to get away from the mad confusion of people and things, and be alone with oneself, nature, and God. We don't have much time for this sort of thing nowadays. But our failure to do so is undeniably one of the causes for the scarcity of spiritual giants in our materialistic day and age. We cannot escape the historical fact that, like forest giants, the giants of the spirit grow tall under the stars.

4. Cultivate a positive philosophy. If ever there was a man who had reason for frustration, it was the apostle Paul. Read the catalog of circumstances that combined to destroy him, as recorded in 2 Corinthians 11:24-33. One marvels that a man could possibly ride such a storm of circumstances without going under! What was Paul's secret? You discover it as you read his epistles. They abound with such expressions as these: "[I am] confident . . . ," "[I] am persuaded . . . ," "I glory . . . ," "I know. . . ." Paul's victory over odds was the all-time classical example of the power of positive thinking. He was certain that God had called him. He was certain that the God who had called him would not fail him. He was certain that God's calling was His pledge to him that He would fulfill in his life the purpose for which He had separated him. He saw in every frustration merely a human or Satanic device to thwart that purpose. And as far as he was concerned, God was more powerful, and better able to see His plan through, than were the united efforts of men and demons to frustrate it.

This must be our personal philosophy if we would be the men and women God expects us to be. We must have unswerving confidence that God has called us, individually, and as a people. We must be fully persuaded that the God who has called us will see us through. When circumstances that appear like impenetrable obstacles, thrust themselves onto the horizons of our lives, we must see in them the devices of the enemy to turn us back and press on in simple faith that the God who called us out is calling us on.

A positive philosophy has as its essential ingredients, confidence, certainty, and persuasion, such as were personified in the life of Paul. If we do not have it, we can cultivate it. We must cultivate it, or go under. Why am I a Seventh-day Adventist? It didn't happen by chance. Such and such were the marvelous workings of God in bringing it about! He had something in mind in doing it. Whatever it was, I am going to let Him fulfill His purpose, regard less of the destructive agencies that range themselves against its accomplishment. Such a philosophy will see us through every crisis, enable us to mount every obstacle, and ride out every storm.

5. Analyze the causes for frustration. We must now, in conclusion, face up squarely to the painful fact that such measures as creative activity, unrewarded service, and temporary withdrawal from the pressures of life, which we discussed as our first, second, and third points, are merely remedies and not cures. They help to relieve the severity of the onslaught that would often crush us if we did not use them as safety valves. But in the final analysis, they are merely safety valves. Their benefit will be short-lived if the basic causes of frustration still exist when we get back to the hard facts of reality.

Having warded off the severity of the at tack, we need to have a good look at the factors involved. Whatever they are, one thing is basic: the reason for our frustration is that we are not accomplishing all that we want to accomplish. For this fact we may be blaming other people, or a variety of circumstances, or both. And while these may possibly enter into the picture, it might well be that we are using them as alibis to evade our personal responsibility. There is always something we can do ourselves, no matter how many external factors might be involved. Don't worry about the factors you can do nothing about. Concentrate on the internal factors--those you can do some thing about.

You may discover certain definite changes that need to be made in your life. These may be in the direction of the conservation of your time. You may be allowing people to fritter away your time with inconsequential trivia. You may be devoting to certain activities more time than they are really worth, and allowing worth-while objectives to suffer. You may need to learn to say No to certain appointments which are not vital and which have no contribution to make toward being effective and fruitful as a soul winner. You may be devoting so much time to serving tables that you have no time left for the all-important task of reaching people with the message. If such a situation doesn't make you frustrated, it certainly should! If it does, don't let it bog you down. Do something about it. Discover how you can shed some of your fringe responsibilities so that you can concentrate on the central things. Don't allow anything to keep you away from the all-important task of winning souls.

The Best Tonic for Frustration

I know of no better tonic for frustration than to win a soul. It is a tragic fact that there are some Seventh-day Adventist workers who are content to go through year after year without ever specifically winning a soul. They feel that because they are connected with one of our institutions "in the work" they have no direct soul-winning responsibility. If such a worker ever experiences a severe attack of "frustration blues" heaven pity the poor man or woman if it doesn't happen! my earnest counsel to him, or her, would be: Win a soul! If you've been an institutional worker for ten or fifteen years without ever getting into a home to hold Bible studies, you owe yourself the stimulation of the experience. It will add a new dimension to your life. You may feel that you do not have time because of your busy program. This is not true. With a few slight but deliberate adjustments to your program you can fit it in. Some of the things of lesser importance will assume their proper perspective. There are 10,000 institutional workers listed in the Seventh-day Adventist Yearbook. If each of these won a soul each year during the forthcoming quadrennium, this one avenue alone would result in 40,000 souls being won for the truth! And the blessing would flow two ways. An evening a week devoted to studying the truth with somebody in his home, keeps a worker on his tiptoes spiritually!

Take time to have a good, objective look at your program. Ask yourself, What am I accomplishing? True, I'm working hard, but am I achieving? Do I have my priorities straight? Am I devoting dollars' worth of time to cents' worth of effort? Could I be accomplishing more? Could I use my time more profitably? Could I reduce my "over head expenditure" of energy? Could I be more efficient, remembering that efficiency is maximum output for the minimum of expenditure? These are questions which only we ourselves can answer, with reference to our own experience. What is more, we must answer them on our knees. Right there at that sacred trysting place as we claim the promise of James 1:5, God will draw near to reveal some of the things that are frustration harborers in our lives, and will point the way to increased productivity.

Thank God for frustration! It may be one of His ways of trying to get it across to us that He has bigger and better things in store for us. Instead of wandering around in a maze of unproductive activism He wants us to break through and find the royal highway to fruitfulness in His service. Instead of sinking from frustration to despair it is our privilege to go forward from height to height, from victory to victory, from strength to strength. We can make a start on that road today.


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August 1971

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