He was a good pastor. He preached fervently and held successful evangelistic meetings. He visited his members often and was sincerely spiritual in his interpersonal relationships. He attended committee meetings and took the administrative responsibilities of his church seriously. The conference administration was pleased with him, since few complaints, if any, crossed the president's desk.
However, over a period of time, the conference treasurer noticed a marked increase in the number of medical receipts the pastor submitted for reimbursement. Ulcers had shown up in one examination, and colitis in another. He was having further tests for headaches and hypertension.
The church began to notice changes also. The once-prompt pastor began arriving late for appointments, and once in a while he didn't show up at all. People started to mention that they hadn't seen him around their homes lately. In private, and very confidentially, the pastor revealed to his elders that he needed "a change," and was seeking a call elsewhere.
The pastor finally had to admit to himself not only that he was dysfunctional in his job but that he really didn't care. He often found himself daydreaming, wasting time by staring at the load of work on his desk. He was becoming more and more aware of job frustration and monotony. Duties that a short time ago brought satisfaction now seemed to demand more energy than he could muster. He noticed that he was trying to avoid people whenever possible, although once he had enjoyed meeting and talking with them.
Perhaps God has forsaken me, he thought. Perhaps I'm washed out both as a pastor and as a man. My health is deteriorating rapidly, I'm failing in my job, and I'm probably becoming emotionally unbalanced.
Job stress and burnout are just as surely a possibility for the pastor as they are for the salesman, executive, or assembly-line super visor. Inadequate training, lack of opportunity for growth, fear of failure, and unrealistic demands are just some of the stress factors that pastors share with others.
But the pastor also has some stress factors that are peculiar to him. Pastors are leaders of a volunteer organization that has high ideals and expectations for its members. But the very fact that it is a volunteer organization leaves the pastor with few really tangible means of ensuring that members of the group follow through on responsibilities and accomplish certain goals. An office manager can exert the power of a paycheck to encourage workers; the pastor must rely on persuasion and spiritual motivation. At the same time, it is the pastor who bears most of the accountability for the success or failure of the church's objectives, as well as for the personal growth of members. At least that is how he often perceives the situation. In addition, he is constantly working with people and their problems, which at times weigh on his heart like a nightmare. And he is involved in a work that is never finished.
Some pastors find after four or five years of ministry that they simply have mistaken their calling. Sometimes the call to be a Christian is confused with a call to be a minister. Adolescent idealism and the need to champion a righteous cause can attract a young convert into preparation for pastoral warfare without his first making sure mat he possesses the necessary personality strengths and gifts for the calling to be genuine. Doctrinal scholarship or even the ability to preach well can never compensate for deficiencies in being able to lead and relate with others. Of course, God can enable an individual to overcome personal deficiencies, but in most cases we must work within the strengths and weaknesses of our personalities.
Some pastors who burn out are workaholics, but not necessarily because they enjoy their work so much. More often the workaholic pastor labors compulsively because of an underlying fear of failure and because the perceived expectations of congregation, administration, and self create a sense of guilt that clamors to be met. Such a pastor becomes driven by an overwhelming attitude of "ought to" and "must" that causes him to sacrifice his days off, his family time, and perhaps even vacations. He doesn't set out intentionally to be intemperate, but he has reached the point of being unable to handle his responsibilities without feeling that he must do everything, solve all problems (especially the unsolvable ones), be every where, and never say No except to his family.
Burnout and the crisis of midlife adjustment often accompany each other. Between the ages of 30 and 45, the average pastor begins to confront his own inner self and evaluate where his life is going. The realization sinks in that he is not as young as he used to be and that the possibility of reaching certain ambitions may be fast disappearing. Sometimes he looks into the future and questions whether he wants to be a pastor all the rest of his days. He has invested himself so completely in his work, and now it seems to him that he has little to show for it. Bitterness can well up as he surveys what seems to him to be wasted years in the past and empty years stretching unrelieved into the future. God seems distant, and everything the pastor has held dear seems to have lost meaning.
Job stress can also come from administration. Research points out that burnout is much more likely to occur among workers whose boss injects a strong atmosphere of fear, gives little opportunity for growth, does not delegate meaningful responsibilities, engages in manipulative strategies, does not exhibit trust, or displays an insensitiveness to personal needs. Administrators who are not aware of then- effect on their workers' mental well-being must share the blame when their pastors burn out.
Stress overload affects every aspect of a person's life—physical, intellectual, social, psychoemotional, and spiritual. Each has its own symptoms.
Symptoms of burnout
Constant fatigue and a sense of being physically drained even when there has been no unusual exertion of the body are an indication of excessive stress and impending burnout. Other symptoms are: a tendency to need more sleep than usual or an inability to sleep at all, emotionally induced illnesses, and minor physical problems that become chronic ailments.
The effect of stress on the mind usually shows up as an inability to concentrate, a tendency to be forgetful, reduced alertness, and a feeling of "information overload" a sense of tension and exhaustion due to excessive exertion of the mental faculties. The individual may turn to escapes, such as light reading or TV, rather than do mental work.
Social burnout is often characterized by a desire to avoid people and their problems. In order to avoid people, one may play such games as looking all around while talking with someone, monopolizing the conversation to avoid having to listen, agreeing with disagreeable opinions just to sidestep confrontation, creating appointments to terminate or avoid discussions, staying home as much as possible, or becoming busy in legitimate, nonperson-oriented ministries such as writing, building, and music. At this stage in burnout there is no hiding the effects in the home. Behind closed doors is an irritable, depressed individual who never has time to talk to the children except to silence them, and who hides in the office as much as possible. He feels like running away from both wife and children and the responsibilities placed upon him by people.
As burnout continues, feelings of boredom, depression, and confusion about one self are characteristic. These feelings are accompanied by a terrible fear that there is no way of escape. Having to admit that one is not able to function properly in one's work and home produces tremendous fear, guilt, and insecurity. And for the pastor to have to admit to God that things are not right produces an added load of guilt.
Perhaps there is no more serious or complicating effect than what burnout does to the spiritual well-being of a pastor. Locked in a desire to escape his environment and responsibilities, the pastor may reject values that he has believed and publicly upheld. Swearing, sexual experimentation, and use of drugs and alcohol are some of the radical behavior changes that indicate spiritual dis integration. His prayer life has been long dead, and Bible reading is meaningless. He may, in an act of desperation, try to regain some spiritual meaning for his life, but he cannot concentrate long enough to derive any benefit from the exertion. Spiritually he is an empty shell, and he feels it is only a matter of time before the shell is cracked and everyone becomes aware that his life and all his words are but cliches and vain ramblings.
The pastor's wife bears a heavy load at such a time. Part of her is angry angry that he didn't slow down when she told him, angry that he didn't take his vacations when he had them coming, angry that he never took his days off. Now he is burned out, and she is angry because it is his fault.
She is also gripped with guilt. Perhaps she didn't do enough to support him as a person and as a pastor, although she is not sure what more she could have done. After all, she was not trained to be a pastor's wife.
She is fearful, fearful that he will do something rash and jeopardize his job and family security. She is afraid that he might forsake her just as he has forsaken his job and his religious values. She is afraid that the children will suffer. In her desperation she seeks help, but he refuses to admit any need for help for himself.
Return from burnout
Pastors, as well as others, can often be legitimately accused of overloading their system. We need to understand ourselves and our real motivations. We need to learn how to conserve our energy so that life and happiness are protected. The following suggestions can help to bring about this understanding and prevent burnout:
1. Review your philosophy of life. In the daily ebb and flow of conflicting demands, what values do you hold to be of supreme importance? Do you make room for humor, creativity, relaxation, and recreation? How important to you is the giving and receiving of love in your day-to-day relationships? Do you experience a balance of physical, mental, spiritual, and social activity?
2. Establish realistic short- and longterm priorities, and stay with them. Underachieving and overachieving are both stressful. Beware of those impulsive demands that throw your priorities out of line.
3. Disengage yourself from the working environment when you leave it. Fight against the constant feeling of having to complete a job that in reality will never be completed.
4. Diversion is often more relaxing and refreshing than complete rest. Choose a hobby or safety-valve activity that will allow you to work off tension and stimulate your interest in matters not related to work.
5. Enjoy life as you live it; drive slower and enjoy the scenery; stop awhile and enjoy a tasty meal; don't book yourself so tight that you can't enjoy the kids.
6. Socialize with people outside your immediate work environment. This will reduce stressful shoptalk. Have a network of real friends with whom you can share yourself deeply, rather than a lot of acquaintances with whom you can share only formal niceties.
7. Make a point to get enough rest and sleep. Cut back on the moonlighting and TV.
8. Avoid, as much as possible, frequent relocations. Accepting a move is often just a way of running away from the painful realities of job frustration and the need to take another look at oneself.
9. Know when to pull back from conflict and when to press an issue. Bury your hatchets before they bury you. Watch out for bitterness.
10. Develop the attitude of gratitude, thankfulness; look for the good in people and situations.
11. Develop the art of tolerance. Aggravating people always have deep-seated needs that can help explain their behavior.
12. Discipline yourself to forget those things that are painful, ugly, and wrong. Think on those things that are true, honor able, just, pure, lovely, and praiseworthy.
13. Be aware of excessive idealism. Most idealistic people are hostile individuals who have taken it upon themselves to draw up their own rules for life and who become angry when other people don't pay attention or agree. If this describes you, then you should broaden your thinking and learn that there is more to life than just being right.
14. Develop realistic expectations of yourself and others. You cannot change the impossible; no one is indispensable; not everyone is going to love you; perfection is seldom found this side of eternity.
15. Don't underestimate the delight of simplicity in your life style.
16. Wage war on "hurry sickness." The obsession to constantly do things faster and better is a sure way to poor health.
17. Develop a daily schedule for creative meditation. Beware of dull and routine prayer and devotions that do not speak to your personal needs and feelings.
18. Take care of your body. Exercise daily, drink sufficient water, breathe the best of God's fresh air, eat fresh fruits and vegetables, and do all those good things that you have counseled to others to do.
19. Determine your stress overload limits and refuse to become involved with activities that demand more than your limit.
20. Maintain a positive growth pattern and refuse to become bogged down with busywork, or to allow yourself to become ground down by the pessimism and problems of others.
While it is impossible to live in a totally stress-free environment, we can do some thing about the amounts and types of stress. Burnout is preventable. Our work, our family, our spiritual life, and our physical and emotional health are too important to sacrifice on the altar of stress.
