The hardness of human hearts

Divorce and remarriage is a very real issue for today's society and church. Jesus addressed the issue in a number of places, such as Matthew 5 and 19, Mark 10 and Luke 16. In this article, we will focus on Matthew 19.

The Pharisees asked Jesus about grounds for divorce (19:1-12). Jesus stressed the indissolubility of marriage. He upheld God's ideal as instituted in the beginning. In this statement, Jesus alludes to the beauty of marriage. In the way he answered the Pharisees' questions He seeks to turn us away from dwelling on the problems in our marriages. This is seen in the context in which the report of Matthew 19:1-12 is found.

The context of Matthew 19:1-20:16

Matthew 19:1 to 20:16 records a series of Jesus' discourses. First, He talks to the Pharisees (19:3-9). Then He speaks to the disciples (19:10-15). In 19:16-22 He dialogues with the rich young ruler, and finally He tells the parable of the laborers (19:27-20:16). These various segments¹ are connected to each other by several literary links.

Father and mother, but not spouse. "Father and mother" is one of the literary connections. In 19:5 Jesus talks about a man leaving father and mother when he marries. In 19:19 He mentions the fifth commandment—honoring father and mother. In 19:29 He states that His disciples may sometimes be forced to leave father and mother for His sake. To leave father and mother in order to marry does not violate the fifth commandment. Neither does leaving father and mother for Jesus' sake.

Matthew 19:29 is particularly interesting: "And everyone who has left houses or brothers or sisters or father or mother or children or farms for my name's sake, will receive many times as much, and will inherit eternal life." Here Jesus talks about leaving siblings, parents, and even children, but He leaves out the possibility of leaving one's spouse. In omit ting a reference to the spouse, the message seems to be: Even for Jesus' sake we are not asked to leave our husband or wife, to be separated from him or her, or to divorce our partner.² Marriage is good, it is indissoluble. Jesus does not break apart marriages when He asks people to follow Him.

In 19:9 Jesus discusses divorce, adultery, and remarriage. In 19:18 He quotes the seventh commandment "You shall not commit adultery." Again in this passage Jesus shows how permanent marriage is in His eyes. Obviously, His statements in Matthew 19:9 and in Matthew 5:27-32 are related to the seventh commandment and therefore to the Decalogue.

Here Jesus argues against the position of the Pharisees by going back to the Creation account and by referring to the Ten Commandments. Jesus' position expands and substantiates the commandments, particularly the seventh commandment in this context. The law is independent of changing cultures and value systems. It is good. God's gift of marriage and His protection of this gift are clearly confirmed by Jesus.

The most important connection between the different parts of Matthew 19 and 20:1-16 is the theme of the hard heart and the related motif of the evil eye.³ The Pharisees showed clear evidence of possessing a hardness of hearts. They looked for ways of interpreting the law that would give them a license to put away an undesirable wife. They did not under stand God's gift of marriage. In doing this they destroyed it by their attitude and behavior (19:3,7). When they thought about marriage, they seemed to have divorce in mind.

But even Jesus' disciples had difficulty accepting His teaching on marriage. They suggested staying single and not marrying if clearly understood Jesus' view, and seemed to lean to the side of the Pharisees. They too found it hard to hold a concept of marriage void of divorce. This showed a hardness of heart in them; the same kind that was manifested later when they encountered the children brought to Jesus for His blessing (19:13)

The same kind of hardness was displayed in the rich young ruler who was not willing to sell his possessions and give the proceeds to the poor. Because of this hardness of heart it was difficult for the rich to enter the kingdom of God (19:21-23). Again the disciples seemed to understand more readily those who did not make it into the kingdom of God (19:25)

Finally, in the parable of the laborers in the vineyard, those who worked all day were not content with their wages. They complained about the generosity of the landowner. Their problem with the master was not that he did not pay them the fair wages agreed upon earlier. Their complaint came when they saw that those who did not have the chance to be employed all day long received the same amount of money as they did, who had worked the whole day. Instead of being moved by gratitude for what had happened to the late comers, they concentrated on them selves and the alleged injustice done to them. The landowner responds: "Is your eye evil because I am good?" (NKJV). They had an "evil eye." Their hardness of heart did not allow them to see the goodness of God.

Thus, the entire section of Matt hew 19:1-20:16 challenges the reader to appreciate the extraordinary gifts of God, one of these being the gift of marriage, and to decidedly turn away from any consideration of divorce. In summary, it can be seen from this passage that:

• To a certain degree, Jesus' relationship with His disciples may be compared to the relationship between husband and wife. For the sake of this relationship one may need to leave other persons and possessions. The benefits are immeasurable

• To follow Jesus does not mean to separate from or divorce a spouse. Marriage is indissoluble

• Jesus' statement on divorce is connected to the seventh commandment. This commandment is binding and is independent of changing times and cultures

• In quoting Jesus, Matthew challenges readers and hearers to repent of hardness of heart and an evil eye, to turn away from any toying with the idea of divorce, and to treasure the wonderful gift of marriage.

More on the hard heart issue

In spite of the different geographical locales, Matthew 18 and 19 are strongly connected. Matthew 19 is preceded by a Matthew 18 conversation between Jesus and His disciples in Capernaum.

At the beginning of chapter 18, the disciples ask, "Who then is greatest in the kingdom of heaven?" (18:1). Jesus' answer dealt with a child and the sin of a brother (18:2-20). After His response Peter asks another question, dealing with the issue of forgiveness (18:21). Jesus replies with a short statement and the parable of the unforgiving servant (18:22-35)

Although the disciples have been warned not to despise the little ones and not to scandalize them (18:6,10), they had not learned their lesson, as 19:13 demonstrates. Instead of welcoming the children in the name of Jesus, they rejected them. While warned against hardness of heart in Matthew 18, the disciples exhibited precisely that behavior. Chapter 18 ends with the warning that the heavenly Father will hand over to torture those who do not forgive their neighbors from their heart (18:34, 35)"From your heart." The motif of a hard heart is already present in chapter 18, although the exact phrase will not appear until 19:8. The unforgiving servant was an example of hardheartedness, and again, it is interesting that this motif is developed in the following passage dealing with divorce and remarriage.

Instead of forgiving theirs spouses, there are people such as the Pharisees who look for loopholes to get out of their marriages and rid themselves of their partner. They seem not to care for their spouse. They forget the immense debt God has forgiven them as they concentrate on the mistakes of their marriage partners against them. Forgiveness is not practiced. Apparently, it is not even considered Claiming to fulfill the law they attempt to interpret the law to their advantage and thus they end up being judged by it.

We are called to fight against all sin including sexual sin, especially as such sin relates to our marriages, as in the case of the sexual sin of adultery. But even in the case of adultery, after repentance, the highest Christian response is to grant forgiveness. Our marriages live from forgiveness. We live from forgiveness. Therefore, we extend our forgiveness to our spouses. Such matters are not settled by divorce. The issue is to forgive each other, thus letting go of the hard heart.

Let us summarize:

1. Matthew 18 with its parallel in Matthew 5:29, 30 prepares the way for the discussion on divorce and adultery in chapter 19. Jesus' statements in Matthew 19 are based on the Creation account, and yet they also contain an exposition of the seventh commandment. Marriage by its very nature is indissoluble

2. Again we are challenged to turn away from hardness of heart and to freely and graciously forgive each other (18:35; 19:8)

3. Instead of seeking a divorce and seeking the chance to be "free," we are challenged to grant forgiveness and stop counting mistakes. Forgiveness is limitless4. Following Matthew 18:15-20, church members are called to forgive their erring fellow believers.

Conclusion

Although this article has not exegeted the passage on divorce in Matthew 19, we see how the context contributes to the understanding of this scripture. We notice the pro found respect and appreciation Jesus has for marriage. He as Creator has instituted it. He as Lawgiver has protected it. Marriage is a gift from paradise, and Jesus wants us to recognize and live by this fact. He challenges our hard hearts and calls us to live in relationships of forgiveness.