EVERY truehearted worker for Christ has a sincere desire for self-improvement. He prays daily that God will increase his effectiveness as a minister of the gospel. Among the many useful purposes for workers' meetings could be the study of such subjects as will promote the success of the minister in his social contacts.
Since Seventh-day Adventist ministers are sometimes criticized for having a lack of culture and courtesy, it seems fitting to study the need of courtesy in the work of the ministry and to assess some of the factors that bear upon the criticism that sometimes comes from both without and within the church.
We are all familiar with the problems that presented themselves to the workers in the early Advent Movement. Faced with an unfriendly, unsympathizing world, disdained by their preaching brethren in the popular churches, and burning with passionate zeal, the church rode forth to conquer the world. A generation of powerful preachers sprang up, men who knew their Bibles, before whom the ministry of the Sundaykeeping churches frequently quailed. The very logic of the Adventist truths was enough to test the courage of the first-day advocates. But one unfortunate development took place. Some men became excellent debaters, and sometimes, in the smoke and heat of the battle, forsook kindness and courtesy with unfortunate results. Notice the counsel that came to the church on this point: "Some ministers who have been long in the work of preaching present truth have made great failures in their labors. They have educated themselves as combatants. . . . Those who love to engage in discussion generally lose their spirituality. ... Debating ministers are generally disqualified to help the flock where they most need help."—Testimonies, vol. 3, pp. 215, 216.
This was scarcely the climate for the development of those refinements that seemed so important to men of milder disposition. We were in too much of a hurry to get the job done, and sometimes we forgot that it is "not by might nor by power, but by my spirit, saith the Lord." But the Seventh-day Adventist Church began to come of age, to realize the truth of what Emerson has said: "Life is not so short but that there is always time enough for courtesy." Shakespeare had said, "Keep a good tongue in your head."
The Christian Approach
It was left for the servant of the Lord to properly evaluate the real need of Christian courtesy in the church: "There is a great want of true politeness among us as a people."—Ibid., vol. 4, p. 392. And again, "If we would humble ourselves before God, and be kind and courteous and tenderhearted and pitiful, there would be one hundred conversions to the truth where now there is only one."—Ibid., vol. 9, p. 189.
This is a restatement of the truth David had declared anciently when he said: "Thou halt also given me the shield of thy salvation: and thy gentleness hath made me great" (2 Sam. 22:36). And Paul wrote to the young man Timothy, "The servant of the Lord must not strive; but be gentle unto all men, apt to teach, patient" (2 Tim. 2:24).
Much of the criticism of Seventh-day Adventist workers on the part of non-Adventist ministers is completely unfounded. It stems from the fact that since the opposer cannot refute the law of God, there appears no way left but to attack the person of the speaker. This is often the recourse of those who champion a losing cause.
But a study of the methods sometimes employed in presenting the third angel's message shows that had God's spokesmen been more kind in presenting the distinctive features of the message there would have been much less opposition, and the amount of labor required to convert souls would have been far less. To cudgel prospective believers with the truth does not recommend it to them. The truth cannot safely be altered, methods of labor may and in some cases should be. This principle extends even to our advertising. It is possible to stir up opposition to the truth by a lack of thoughtfulness in the manner we elect to announce our discourses.
"Lettuce," "Kale," and "Greenstur Taboo
Consideration for persons of refinement will lead us to exercise care in such apparently small matters as how we appeal for offerings. Men and women who are under conviction are hypersensitive, and the slightest irregularity may be disastrous. An irreverent attempt to increase the size of the evening offering may be all that is needed to turn a soul away from accepting the saving truth. Some men when under conviction are looking for excuses to reject Christ's claims upon them, and it should be our study to avoid saying anything that could possibly offend. References to "lettuce," "kale," and "greenstuff" (slang expressions for money) in asking for the offering can excite resentment on the part of one whose sensibilities are refined.
True Christian courtesy is in reality a proper respect and love for the individual. There are those who believe that one of the reasons for Christ's great effectiveness as a soul winner was His keen understanding and appreciation of the individual. He who wishes to preserve his self-respect must be careful not to wound needlessly the self-respect of others.
The Example of Christ
Consider the Saviour's dealing with Simon as recorded in Luke 7:40. We are familiar with the record. Jesus, knowing the thoughts that were going through the man's mind, of his guilt, his hardness of heart, did not openly rebuke him. Jesus' kindness to Simon went unnoticed by the others, but in The Desire of Ages we read that "Simon was touched by the kindness of Jesus in not openly rebuking him before the guests. . . . He saw that Jesus did not wish to expose his guilt to others, but sought by a true statement of the case to convince his mind, and by pitying kindness to subdue his heart."—Page 567.
I fear we find it easier to attempt the former and leave the other undone. To the casual observer acquainted with the facts, Simon did not deserve such thoughtful treatment. His selfish conduct was deserving of an open disclosure. But Jesus was not interested in displaying His intimate knowledge of Simon's sins. He was concerned with the man's soul; He chose His words with care in order that Simon might see the condition of his heart and accept the salvation that Jesus was offering him. Simon was forever grateful to the Saviour for His kindness.
The unsanctified heart seeks to cut others down to size. A living former President of our nation once said of his political opponent, "Leave him to me—I'll cut him down to size." I assume "to size" meant to the dimensions of his detractor.
Such conduct ought to be far from the Christian minister. It is the work of the great destroyer. It reveals an undue concern for self, and assumes that self is the larger for making another appear smaller. Few of us have escaped the temptation to indulge in this form of diversion, but let us stand aside, lest our selfishness and poor manners appear to all men. The divinely inspired comment on Jesus' treatment of Simon reads: "Stern denunciation would have hardened Simon against repentance, but patient admonition convinced him of his error."—Ibid., pp. 567, 568.
The daily paper published in the community where I lived recently ran a picture and story of a Negro who has donated nearly four gallons of blood to the Red Cross. Still more recently I had occasion to talk with the Red Cross director under whose supervision this man gave his blood. This woman referred to the Negro donor and said: "I am so glad they honored him. If we make an error with most people they will call out loudly: 'Where do we get a card around here?' We know they just want to be noticed," she said, "but this man never embarrasses us by directing attention to our failures."
The world puts great premium on courtesy and good manners. Seventh-day Adventist ministers can ill afford to indulge in uncouth mannerisms, discourteous speech, and unkindness, either among themselves or among unbelievers, and those of us who are older ought to set an example to the young. Sometimes our relations to one another leave much to be desired. A few years ago a young minister in the course of a conversation referred to some of his fellow ministers as "these yokels." His poor manners were exceeded only by his unmitigated self-esteem. No doubt a few years will suffice to correct the latter, but the other will take the Spirit of God. Few would argue that because we have the truth we therefore possess the best manners.
The Case of Brother B
At this point I quote from Testimonies, volume 2, page 220: "I was shown the case of Brother B. He feels unhappy. He is dissatisfied with his brethren. His mind has been exercised for some time that it was his duty to carry the message. He has the ability, and, as far as his knowledge of the truth is concerned, he is capable; but he lacks culture. He has not learned to control himself. It requires great wisdom to deal with minds, and he is not qualified for this work. He understands the theory, but has not educated himself in forbearance, patience, gentleness, kindness, and true courteousness. If anything arises which does not meet his mind, he does not stop to consider whether it is wisdom to take notice of it, or to let it pass until it shall be fully considered. He braces himself at once for battle. He is harsh, severe, denunciatory, and if things do not meet his mind, he raises disturbance at once. He possesses in his organization the elements of war rather than of sweet peace and harmony. . . . Brother B will be in danger of tearing down more than he can build
This man was kept out of the ministry because he failed to cultivate a spirit of humility and learn gentleness and patience. We should be encouraged by these words from the same author: "The religion of Jesus softens whatever is hard and rough in the temper, and smooths whatever is rugged and sharp in the manners. It makes the words gentle and the demeanor winning. Let us learn from Christ how to combine a high sense of purity and integrity with sunniness of disposition."—Gospel Workers, p. 122.
It may be appropriate to mention that we are to be careful in the manner we relate ourselves to those in authority in the church. Peter speaks under inspiration of some who were "not afraid to speak evil of dignities. Whereas angels, which are greater in power and might, bring not railing accusation against them before the Lord" (2 Peter 2:10, 11).
Certainly we as shepherds of God's flocks will miss a great blessing if we fail to receive this wisdom from heaven. A passage that has caused me to see how far short I have fallen from the Master's way is found in The Ministry of Healing, pages 492, 493.
Good Counsel
"Cultivate the habit of speaking well of others. Dwell upon the good qualities of those with whom you associate, and see as little as possible of their errors and failings. When tempted to complain of what someone has said or done, praise something in that person's life or character. . . . We are too indifferent in regard to one another. Too often we forget that our fellow laborers are in need of strength and cheer. Take care to assure them of your interest and sympathy. Help them by your prayers, and let them know that you do it."
