ELIHU, the son of a Buzite, one of Job's friends, was an eloquent debater. His material fills several chapters in the book of Job. Listen to one of his confessions that zeros in on the subject under discussion:
"I also will give my answer; I also will declare my opinion. For I am full of words, the spirit within me constrains me. Behold, my heart is like wine that has no vent; like new wineskins, it is ready to burst. I must speak, that I may find relief; I must open my lips and answer. I will not show partiality to any person or use flattery toward any man. For I do not know how to flatter, else would my Maker soon put an end to me" (Job 32:17-22, R.S.V.).
The church has no lack of Elihus who are "full of words." Too often many of us have played the part of Elihu. Argument, for some of us, is like a form of entertainment. We might label it a hobby, but it is a devastating hobby. It may sharpen a person's intellectual wits, but it surely makes one a spiritual half-wit.
My father, who has an extraordinary capacity to control his tongue, gently reminded me that argument was not only degrading but a poor type of conversation.
Most rebuttals put the rebutter on the same level as his opponent—generally a low level! If we could only remember that it isn't easy to cut a bale of cotton with a sword. Solomon was dead right when he said, "If a wise man has an argument with a fool, the fool only rages and laughs, and there is no quiet" (Prov. 29:9, R.S.V.). To this type of man a good reason means nothing. A rock and a feather fall at the same speed in a vacuum. I have long since come to the conclusion that only a fool argues!
This does not mean a man should never express his opinion. It is why it is expressed, the way it is expressed, and when it is expressed that counts. I have watched real leaders express themselves calmly and quietly with never a trace of a debating spirit. They knew the truth of Proverbs 15:23: "A word in season, how good it is!" (R.S.V.).
Some of us have to express our opinions on every subject whether we know any thing about the subject or not. One elderly committee member set a blessed example for me a few years ago. This man possessed great wisdom, and was a most familiar leader in our movement. He would sit on committee after committee and never say a word. But when he did speak, everybody listened intently. More than once a committee decision was influenced by this person after he spoke a few well-chosen words slowly, but emphatically, at the right time.
His tongue-control ability awed and baffled me. One day I asked him how he could sit there and not get into the discussion fray. He quietly replied, "Most of the discussion on any committee doesn't center on matters of real principle. It is just a matter of personal preference, and whether the vote goes one way or another really isn't too important."
He continued, "If I have something to say, I want my statement to have the greatest impact in those areas where principles are at stake." Then he quoted Proverbs 13:3: "He that keepeth his mouth keepeth his life: but he that openeth wide his lips shall have destruction."
I have never forgotten this philosophy. I only wish I could say I have always practiced it. Really, when we begin to investigate all the episodes involving argument and discussion, most of them don't amount to an atom of air. Argument usually proves, not what is right and good, but what a person really wants.
I have also discovered that the louder a person speaks, the weaker his logic usually is. Why is it a person thinks that if he talks loud and fast enough, he makes his point, when just the opposite is generally true?
