My mother was dying of acute leukemia. I knew she was not going to pull through. I sat on her bed, thinking of the complexities of life; so staggering when they are so personal. I sat helpless, hopeless as I had throughout her suffering. But even in that valley of the shadow of death, I found encouragement and comfort in two people: a 22-year-old, tall and skinny medical intern and my pastor.
I remember the intern not for what he did or said, but for the hope and sunshine he brought through his presence and his pleasant words. The pastor brought a professional and spiritual touch that was so consoling. To them, my mom was important and worthy of every attention they could give.
Over the span of nine months, I watched my mom live and die in the hospital, a drama watched by countless families every day. As a pastor and hospital chaplain I know that God can cure anyone, but as a son I wasn't praying for a medical miracle. I was praying for hope and God gave me that hope through the ministry of the intern and the pastor.
Although hospital visitation is not as publicly impressive as the preaching event, it is a ministry that people need. Pastors and lay people with compassion, competency, and time are excellent ministers of this hope. Not even the most skilled of medical personnel can provide this. Yet hospital visitation on the part of pastors is becoming a neglected art. There are three possible reasons for this: low priority, lack of practical skill, and fear.
Priority of visitation
Low priority is a result of seeing visitation as a ministry of low significance and visibility. That which directly affects more people, we theologically conclude, is best for the kingdom. But Jesus defined priority not in terms of visibility or popularity, but in terms of individual care and compassion. For example, in the midst of a vast crowd thronging around Jesus, the Master focused His attention on a dead girl and a woman suffering from 12 years of bleeding (Luke 8:41-56).
In spite of the popularity and the publicity that the crowd promised, Jesus paused to care for the needs of the individuals, and bring comfort and healing to them. To Him, ministry to the individual is as important, if not more important, than ministry to the crowds.
Jesus' priority was on the needs of people, whether many or few, close or far away, sick, dead, or already healed. Our priorities as pas tors become distorted when we only concentrate on getting the most out of our time rather than shepherding the flock that is under our care (1 Peter 5:2).
Skills in visitation
In addition to giving priority to visitation, a pastor should have practical skills to make the ministry effective. Such skills include simple matters such as respecting the patient as well as the hospital.
Before we visit someone in the hospital, we should call the hospital to ensure that the patient is still there. We need to make sure we respect the atmosphere of the hospital. Patients have a keen sense of smell and may be averse to strong fragrances. Even the clothing we wear during a visit may send a wrong mes sage. We should wash our hands before we see a patient, and wash our hands after we leave.
Before we walk into the room, we need to be sure of the name of the patient and that of the nurse attending. We can make our visit personal by calling them by their names.
When you get to the room, read the signs on the outside of the door and adhere to hospital policy concerning gloves, masks, or other instructions. Knock before entering, and open the door gently. Respect the patient. If you shake the patient's hand, be aware that there may be IV needles or it may be awkward for the patient to shake hands. Be prepared for the smells in a hospital room.
Even if you stay only a few seconds, make sure that the patient senses you care. Sitting down, a gentle touch, a caring word, a thoughtful prayer, or just a smile may convey a soothing and comforting ministry.
Be careful not to ask inconvenient questions. There is no need to preach. Listen. Let the patient tell you what's going on. Patients often want your presence more than your answers. Be quick to listen, slow to speak.
If the patient cannot talk, you may not want to talk much either. The patient may not have the energy to listen. A gesture of care or a smile would convey your concern just as much as many words. If the patient is trying to tell you something that you cannot discern, guess what he or she is trying to say and respond in an encouraging way.
Your hands can often proclaim the gospel more profoundly than the best of your sermons. As you pray, hold the patient's hand, if that is desirable. Concentrate on the patient and not on yourself. Do not hurry and make the patient feel like a burden to your busy schedule. Listen and pray.
Fear of visitation
For some pastors, hospital visitation can be an experience of fear. I once visited a hospital to minister to a couple whose only child was lying brain dead in the Intensive Care Unit. Although the father tried to compose himself, the mother was broken.
The situation got worse when the grandparents came in. Here was the life of a little child, hanging in a balance, with little hope. What do you say to parents and grandparents whose dreams were all built around this child? I had no words to share; even praying seemed difficult. I was struck with fear myself.
Such fear is not the fear of the incompetent, or of the intellectually weak, or of the emotionally weary. Such fear comes to remind us that we are not in control. I can repeat Romans 8:28, but that is no consolation for the immediate situation.
As pastors we need to accept that fear arising from such desperate situa tions as medicine for our egos. In such a situation we may be silent and hon est, and allow our fear to show how human we are and how we, too, share the journey of the suffering ones.
Seeing God through the pastor's humanity brings hope in even the most wretched circumstance. The hospital can remind us that there is no greater experience than to be a very human pastor called to reflect the character of God. Being a pastor in the hospital means that we are the personal touch of the presence of God for people who need God more than eloquence.
